I am really going to have to get my hands on a camera because I’m quickly running out of fresh material to share with you guys. Torie was the resident photographer and she had a good camera and a good eye. I, on the other hand, have only my eyes to record what’s going on around me, and they can’t always be relied on to tell the truth, and besides, as of yet, science has not yet caught up with my idea for eye camera implants. I know it’s not just my idea – you’ve had it too, haven’t you? – which makes it even less conceivable that it hasn’t come about yet. Come on scientists! Catch up! Stop looking for cures for cancer and AIDS, for the love of. Priorities!
At the moment, I’m writing this to the background of some documentary on the History channel featuring the Knights Templar, ugh. I understand the value of revisiting certain historical events, if for no other reason than to make sure that they are never again repeated, but that doesn’t mean they need to be revisited by me. Scott will be leaving on a bike ride soon, which means I’ll be able to watch something I like. Something significant. Something like a sitcom or old horror B movie.
Okay, I’m by myself now and am “watching” the second season of Veronica Mars, which I’ve been working on for a couple months now. It’s one of those shows, for me, that can serve as the perfect background to whatever else it is I want to do, such as, for example, write an inane blog post. Yyes! After this I should do the dishes. As soon as they invent an implant that does the housework for you, I’m money. And don’t tell me they did, and they’re hands, because then I might have to use my implants to smack you upside the head.
I warned you: there is nothing important going on here.
Except maybe to tell you that I’m feeling happy. Not just contented, but actually happy. Happiness – it is becoming more apparent to me all the time – is truly a state of mind. Events can be falling down all around our ears, but happiness is right at our fingertips with just a switch of perspective. I’m not discounting chemical imbalances, which can make our brain wires cross, or immediate loss, which takes time to grieve, but anything beyond that is totally doable. Even if it takes some practice to wend our way into it. Want to know why happiness is finally consistently available to me? It’s because I am beginning to no longer: 1) dwell on the past, 2) complain about the present, or 3) wish on the future. I’m just here, accepting and grateful, in the ever-present eternal Now. And that’s all there ever is. As soon as a moment passes, it becomes the past, only a memory; and any thought of the future is only a fantasy. What’s real is happening right now, and only now. It’s the best place to Be. It’s the source of all that I need and want, of all that I was, am, and ever will be, which remains unchanged at its core, tucked away from the layers of ego I’ve pulled over me, like a covering, during my time here on earth. From this source, out of which we’re all born, rises everything that’s good! All the love and creativity and generosity, all the fruits of the spirit, that we encourage each other, and try ourselves, to embody. Embody, not just do. Anything outside of me and this very moment is only extra. I finally get that.
Which doesn’t mean I live it perfectly. I still get irritated at times, or broadsided by past hurts that make me feel sad, but the length of time I stay in those toxic feelings is shorter all the time, sometimes only minutes. I’ve never been able to feel this way before and it’s such a relief, which is why I yammer on about it incessantly. I only keep talking about it because I want you to know that it’s possible for everyone! It isn’t a secret, or a magic formula, or a scam, and wiser people than I have been extolling its life-altering value for centuries. Happiness is possible for everyone. EV. UH. RY. ONE. Not only me! That means you, too.
Oh, and just wondering… Am I the only one who thinks it would be brilliant for Gary Oldman and Sam Rockwell to play brothers in a quirky dark comedy?
Love you guys! xo
The 133. Crowd 